dr. insensitive

so I go to my RE's today, wanting to know if the Metformin is working. He has no answers for me. Since I'm getting my periods around 35 days I should be relieved to be getting my period monthly he says. How do I know I'm ovulating I ask. Husband and I have been trying to guess when I'm fertile but 3 months of that and metformin and we haven't gotten pregnant. My hair is still falling out in clumps I say. He's dismissive of my questions. Tells me to be patient. I wonder if he has any sense of what a woman goes through during all of this.

I am ready to be more than patient. However I still want some sort of confirmation that I'm on the right path. After being diagnosed with PCOS the doctor concluded it was most likely due to elevated testosterone levels, and thus diagnosed me as insulin resistant. Do we re-do blood work to see if the testosterone level has gone down? RE doesn't think that's neccessary. Which leaves me still wondering- how do I know what we're doing is the right course of treatment then.

I leave his office absolutely devastated and call husband in tears. The rest of the day is an exhausting effort to keep a sane face at work.

the beginning

it's been a journey. Today marks a year since I went off birth control. It was initially because I ran out of pills and the husband and I thought it might just be a sign that we should start trying. We'd had the conversation and had planned to start trying in early 08, so it was only ahead of schedule by a few months. As soon as I went off the pill, things went wrong.

• My face instantly flared up. I've always gotten some pimples, but this was unlike anything before. I was getting huge cysts all over my jaw line.
• my period was normal for the first two months, but then started getting really erratic. I've always been a regular 28 day girl, but suddenly it was going on 38 days... 45 days..
• I was gaining weight at a frantic pace, even though my diet hadn't altered at all. It all seemed to be concentrated on my waist.
• my hair was falling out in clumps.

I was going to different doctors for the different symptoms with no one putting two and two together. Finally my gynocologist did a sonogram and saw the cysts. I was diagnosed with PCOS. That was some 5 months ago. After that it was another month until I got an appointment with a Reproductive Endocronologist who had me in his office doing bloodwork days on end. Finally I was put on metformin.

I started on 500 mg and gradually transitioned to 2000mg. It was two months of pure hell. I'd start at 500 and felt sick/nauseous for days straight. Just as my body adjusted, I transitioned to the next dose at 1000mg and once again the side effects were repeated. Same thing at 1500mg and especially harsh sideeffects at 2000mg which lasted a good month. It's been a week or more now that I've finally not felt the day long nausea. I think my body may finally be acclimated to the metformin, some 3 full months later.